I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Randomize