I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize
