Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
