so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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