too bad you live with your parents still
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Randomize