Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
