have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
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