just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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