Grow some girl-balls and come out already
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize
