Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
it's great music for shaving your balls
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize
