He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
