Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
