What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
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