Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
