Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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