i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
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