We won't sleep together?
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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