So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
