Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
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