wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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