they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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