I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
