idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Randomize