i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Randomize