I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize
