i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
