google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
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