Say something about gay babies.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
