Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
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