Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
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