Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
