Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Randomize