I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Randomize
