whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
