I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
You almost got us killed.
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