I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Randomize
