I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize
