my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
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