You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
