she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
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