I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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