I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
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