was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
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