how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
