So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
