I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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