to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
as a side note pls kill me
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize