no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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