Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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