So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Randomize
